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Grow Up Already

May 9, 2009

What do you want to be when you grow up?

When I was little I used to tell people I wanted to be a pediatrician when I grew up. When I was in high school I wanted to be an actress. In college I thought for a while that I wanted to be a youth pastor.

Why did I choose Journalism? I probably should have chosen advertizing or marketing now that I look back on it. And I know why I didn’t choose broadcasting – because I know I’m not pretty enough to make it on TV.

My friend Jeremy loaned me the book “48 Days to the Job You Love.” I’m only on day three and I already know I need a change. I feel like I’m back at a crossroads in my career right now – like it’s time to choose again. So, what do I want to be when I grow up?

I don’t have any clue what my calling is. Right now I can’t hear anything calling me (except maybe my couch and my refrigerator). Maybe I’ve just gone deaf after all the schooling and expectations everyone had for me.

See, for some reason everyone thought I was smart – so I needed to do something that our society considers big. Like being a doctor. But I’m also a ‘good’ person, so I also have to do something noble, like take care of children. Hence the pediatrician line.

But when the time came I was too lazy for medical school. Oh, and I can’t handle the idea of cutting up a dead body for an entire semester. I really don’t want to see what’s in there.

My mom always said I should be a teacher – but I bought some of the lies of society. Lies like: teaching is a thankless job; teachers don’t get paid enough money; those who can do, those who can’t teach.

I figured I can, and I want to get paid and thanked for it. Too bad I picked journalism – I get paid less than a teacher and no one thanks me.

So, I have 45 days left to find some way to get onto a path toward a job I love. I wonder, what’s it gonna be. Will I finally be able to hear that voice that calls me to something that gives me purpose? That makes me feel complete? The thing I was meant to do? What the heck am I meant to do?

How about you guys, what did you want to be when you were little? Why did you decide to do what you’re doing now?

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