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Back in the Box

May 15, 2009
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I was watching the movie “A Few Good Men” this morning while I was getting ready for work. It got me thinking about a lot of things. Things like honor and passion and vows and having a code to live by. It also made me think about following orders.

There are sort of two groups of people in the movie, the group with the ‘code’ that follows orders with out question and, well the lawyers. I thought about it on and off for the rest of the day and I realized that I always question authority. Whether I do it outright and in the authoriy’s face or off to the side or even just to myself I am always full of the questions for those figures.

I think I was taught to be this way. I definitely remember having tendancies like that encouraged in me. I’m starting to wish I could just follow orders. Just do what I’m told with out question or concern.

That the tripod to the video shoot, work nights and don’t complain, accept rejection and move on.

Maybe the teachers should have beaten it into me that I should follow instructions without question. They could have made sure I was thinking inside the box. I might be better of now if they had told me not to be a problem solver or heaven forbid a dreamer.

It’s all so frustrating — seeing the mistakes authory figures make and thinking of possible solutions that will never happen becaue I’m not the authority figure. And there are so may authority figures in our lives…in my life.

Part of what is frustrating about this is that some things can be changed, but somethings just need to be accepted — that’s just the way things are, you know? But how am I supposed to know the difference? What things can I really affect and what things are futile to pursue?

I don’t want to waste my time anymore. It is becoming more and more evident to me how short life is and how litte I am capable of accomplishing in this short life. I don’t want to spend my time and energy on futile endeavors. My head feels bloody against this brick wall.

Okay everyone…get back in your box!

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