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Arbitrary Deadlines

August 19, 2009
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I have a good friend who just broke up with her boyfriend and he still wants to be friends. She vacillates between wanting to cut him off completely and try to stay friends. The problem is that what she really wants is for him to come to his senses, quit monkeying around and sweep her off her feet.

So I advised her to cut him off completely.

“But he says he really wants to be friends.”

“The kind of friends who go camping together? Doesn’t he have any guy friends?”

“I didn’t go camping with him.”

“I know, but it seems like he wants all of the perks of a male-female relationship without the responsibilities. If he really just wants to be friends tell him to wait six months and if he still wants to be friends then you can try it.”

“He won’t want to be friends in six months.”

“Well then he doesn’t want to be your friend too badly, does he?”

Why six months? I have no idea. I just gave her an arbitrary deadline. Since I’m not doing too good on my whole Calling in the One Homework I thought I would give myself a bit of an arbitrary deadline – along the same line.

I actually gave myself some arbitrary deadlines in June. For some reason November really resonated with me. I can’t imagine why…

Before I found out he was leaving I was thinking I might let myself consider being friends with Daniel again in November. But I will definitely have gone through the entire Calling in the One and all of the homework involved – in depth. Also, if I get this second job I want to have some credit cards paid off by November.

My friend Julie also dared me to sign up for match.com. I think I may do that in November as well.

I think I need to set a lot more goals with deadlines actually. Otherwise I probably won’t finish anything. Journalism has really ruined me in that way. Unless a deadline is looming I just don’t get a lot done.

How about you all? Are there any deadlines you think I should set for myself? Do you have any personal deadlines set for yourselves that you’d like to share? — even arbitrary ones?

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