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Inside the Purse

August 7, 2010

I cleaned out my purse today and a question occurred to me: What can you learn about a woman by looking in her purse? (How’s this for a peek behind the curtain, Daniel fan?)

Well, let’s see what you can learn about me (or not learn).

Let’s start with the outside pouch:

  • 14 pens of various colors (mostly pink and mostly of the gel variety)
  • one checkbook, not in a checkbook case
  • a few bobby pins
  • a wet-wipe
  • a note pad that I boosted from my mom and dad’s house that says “Huron Clinic” at the top
  • the key card that gets me past the lobby of my office
  • my wallet

Inside my wallet:

  •  a couple of pieces of note paper, one with things to do and one with my grocery list
  • a dollar
  • another wet wipe
  • my driver’s license
  • all the receipts from my visits to my counsellor for the year
  • various credit cards: Cabella’s Visa, Chase BP Visa (even though I cancelled it — I need to throw that away) Victoria’s Secret VIP card, Kohl’s card (that I don’t think I ever activated), Maurice’s card, Buckle card (which I also think I cancelled), my credit union Visa and two Visa check cards — also from my credit union.
  • various gift cards: a Wal Mart gift card (I don’t know how much is on it), a BP gift card (again, I have no idea how much is on it), a Victoria’s Secret gift card (you guessed it, I have no idea how much is on it)
  • various loyalty punch cards: Black Hills Bagels (a sandwich card), Alternative Fuel, Maurice’s, the Buckle, Cold Stone Creamery, Graffiti’s Car Was and Dunn Bros. 
  • one of my business cards — that’s right, I’m a business data analyst, yeah, I don’t know what that means either

Side Pouches:

  • One of the side pouches usually has my cellie in it.
  • The other side pouch currently has my flash drive and four tubes of SoftLips chapstick.

Inside the bag:

  • a full-size, purple Mead Five-Star notebook, college-ruled, with a pen in the wire binding
  • MaGraw-Hill’s GRE study book
  • my laptop
  • the cord for my laptop
  • three issues of Writer’s Digest
  • a yellow, Mead Five-Star composition-style notebook, college-ruled
  • various colors of 5.5 x 8.5 index cards
  • the book “How to Flirt” (my friend Vikki loaned to me)
  • “Calling in the One” by Katherine Woodward Thomas
  • a black and silver journal with pink lining pages — that I write in in only pink ink which is devoted to my study of the above book

The inside pouch:

  • bright pink Post-it notes
  • four double-A batteries
  • one condom
  • one empty condom wrapper (which has been there for a long time because I never look in this pouch– I need to throw that away)
  • another wet wipe

Okay, now we can psychoanalyse me based on the bits in my bag. I’m sure some of you ladies noticed that there are almost no beautification bits in my purse. I usually don’t wear make-up, except for eye makeup and I only apply it once at the beginning of the day.

Many of you may have noticed all the credit cards. Currently only one of them has a balance, and I have actually been getting rid of credit cards one by one for a couple of years now. Which is why I have a few that have been cancelled that haven’t gotten rid of yet. I should cut those up tonight in some sort of freedom ceremony.

Let’s see…what else? Obviously, the big pouch is full of writing stuff. That’s easy to explain. I want to take all of those things with me everywhere I go so that when I have time I get stuff done. At least that’s the plan. I don’t write as much as I need to and I sure as heck haven’t been studying for the GRE enough.

And the other really obvious thing — what’s up with the wet wipes? Maybe you guys can help me figure out what that one means.

What do you all think the stuff in my purse means? And how about the rest of you ladies — what baggage are you carrying around? And how about you fellas — what’s in your wallet? Come on, be brave, let my lady readers see behind your curtain.

30 Comments leave one →
  1. Tanya permalink
    August 7, 2010 8:33 pm

    Cracks me up that you have 15 pens and 4 tubes of chapstick. Talk about redundancy! 🙂


  2. August 7, 2010 9:50 pm

    This is interesting, my first thought was, wow this girl has a lot in her purse! :). I don’t think I have nearly that much stuff. You’d be good to have around in a natural disaster!

    My two faves from your list are the condoms (well one condom and a wrapper) and How To Flirt. Nothing says single gal better 🙂



    • August 8, 2010 1:00 pm

      You know I have a soul-sister crush on you, Catherine! If there is a natural disaster I think you would be a good one to have around — if for no other reason thanthe fact that you are certain to be good company.


  3. dave c permalink
    August 8, 2010 8:59 am

    I see some issues here.

    1.) There’s a website about David Allen’s “getting things done” called Anyway, one of the big points they brought-up on that website, is getting a “jimi wallet”. It’s a little plastic case, fits 6 cards, or 5 cards and folded money. If anything is beyond that, supposedly it’s too much baggage to be carrying around.
    2.) Who carries a purse with like 6-8 lbs of books?
    3.) You don’t need condoms if you have a GRE study book.


    • August 8, 2010 12:45 pm

      1. I don’t live ina big city where I lug this stuff around for miles each day. I live in RC where we all drive everywhere.o I carry it all from my apt to the car and my car to wherever I’m going.

      2. I guess I do.

      3. I don’t need condoms if I have a GRE study book huh? Are you suggesting that grad school is enough birth control? Are you saying that no man will want to shag me if I go to grad school? Should I stop trying to get into grad school now? I’m suddenly depressed.


    • August 8, 2010 6:52 pm

      1. I guess I have far too much baggage.

      2. Um…I do.

      3. Are you saying that studing for the GRE is all the birth control a girl needs? I mean are you suggesting that no one will want to have sex with me since I’m trying to get to grad school? I’m depressed.


  4. dave c permalink
    August 8, 2010 9:04 am

    Ok, posting comments on your stuff is just rude without comments on my stuff. Be ware, I do clean this stuff out often because it has to fit in my back pocket:

    Costco membership
    Capital one card
    Library card
    Reward zone card
    Old navy card
    case ‘backup’ card
    Big Brothers Big Sisters qualifying card
    Lapsed Gym membership (which gets taken out, glad I saw it)
    Business card for a guy
    Qdoba card (one of the few ‘frequency’ cards that actually matters)
    Insurance cards for motorcycle and truck
    Frequent buyer card for this asian place around the way.
    Blockbuster membership (which…might as well be removed at this point)
    6 McDonald’s monoply game pieces from like, the time before last that they did monopoly.


    • August 8, 2010 12:48 pm

      I had no idea Qdoba had a loyalty card. I’m going to have to get one the next time I’m there! Also, i should have known that you would have some kind of game piece amongst your things.


    • August 8, 2010 6:53 pm

      I didn’t know that Qdoba had a loyalty program — I’ll have to get one of those ASAP!

      P.S. I should have known that you would have some sort of game piece in ro wallet.


  5. dave c permalink
    August 8, 2010 9:05 am

    and by rude, I mean it’s rude for me to make fun of your stuff without giving you the opportunity to make fun of mine.


  6. Daniel permalink
    August 8, 2010 9:38 am

    Haha! Um, when does a purse cease being a purse, and becomes a suitcase? 😉

    I think all that ‘stuff’ means you’re going places. Ahem, and the four double-A batteries, one condom, one empty condom wrapper, and wet wipe, means you like to have fun along the way. ;-D

    As for my wallet, let’s see.

    I have three dollars, and I’m thinking where did that come from? I never carry cash. Then I remember, I went to Cleveland last weekend and needed tollbooth money.

    A couple of Walmart receipts. A gas receipt.

    A pink driver’s license. Yep, just what every man wants.

    Social security card.

    Farm bureau card; supposed to give me discounts on my car and home insurance.

    Library card.

    My late wife’s university ID.

    OEA card.

    Various insurance cards.

    My university ID.

    Best Buy credit card. Yeah, just what every man needs!

    Sam’s Club membership card.

    GNC Gold Card. Two words; Mega Men!

    Discover card; for emergencies only.

    Debit card; for everything else.

    Some bank account card.

    Um, that’s it!

    Okay, let’s start analyzing! lol The first thing you notice, is no makeup. What’s the point? The next thing, only one credit card. I don’t consider the Best Buy card a true credit card. It’s like store credit that I never carry a balance on. If I can’t pay cash for something, then I can’t afford it. One exception is my car. At zero percent interest, I figured might as well use someone else’s money and the money I have invested can stay hard at work. 😉

    So, there’s a glimpse. Do you like what you see?

    I slowly let the curtain lay back against the windowpane. The blinds still drawn, I can see the light and feel the warmth of the sun. Perhaps one day, the sun will come shining through.


  7. August 8, 2010 11:28 am

    Wet wipes mean you’re prepared for a sticky situation. They always come in handy.

    My bag has a wallet, phone, pen, work key-card, package of tissues, a couple of bandaids and some mints.

    Your post doesn’t make me want to psycho-analyze you, it makes me want to recommend a good chiropractor. That is a lot of stuff and your purse must be gigantic and extremely heavy.


  8. August 8, 2010 12:17 pm

    I still have my student I.D. from St. John’s. The picture is from my freshman year of college. I can’t bring myself to throw it out.


  9. Daniel permalink
    August 8, 2010 2:01 pm

    Is ‘How to Flirt” by Marty Westerman?


  10. dave c permalink
    August 8, 2010 7:55 pm

    Well, I’m just saying, a GRE study guide is some degree of, “ask me about my HP-49”.


  11. dave c permalink
    August 8, 2010 7:58 pm

    Which…trust me, “ask me about my HP-49” doesn’t work on the ladies.

    …although, if you hang out on the SDSM&T campus, you can get some MAD introverted geek action.

    In fact, I wonder if you could wear an eye-patch, splash on something that would give you a bad rash…develop a nervous tick, and I bet you could STILL get guys on the SDSM&T campus.


    • August 8, 2010 8:47 pm

      Those guys are too young for me. Besides…the last few i hit on turned me down. Although one of them basically said that we could be sex buddies. Always sex buddies everywhere when you want a boyfriend!


  12. dave c permalink
    August 8, 2010 10:58 pm

    My memories might be a little hazy as I said that. You see, the first couple of years where you actually see girls a time or two, you might be a little picky. I mean, they’re fresh out of highschool and… well… queue Matthew McConnahey from “Dazed and Confused”, “I get older, and they stay the same aaaaaage.”

    However, you get into your discipline classes/upper level engineering courses… the only reason you take math classes is just to see the occasional female.

    Which is an odd thing. Put ‘applied math’ down and all the girls show up. Call it ‘computer science’ and they run for the hills.


    • August 9, 2010 8:27 am

      I only took one math class in college — because I only had to take one to graduate. But most of my classes were 90% women or 90% men, nothing in the middle.


  13. August 9, 2010 3:46 am

    I take pride in having only 8 cards in my wallet. The more junk that gets in there, the most lopsided and uncomfortable I’m gonna be anytime I sit down! I just wish we’d finally have a completely cashless society so I wouldn’t have to carry that around either.

    Trindaz on Fedang


  14. August 9, 2010 11:24 pm

    Hey, I like this post. I have ever wondered about the mysteries lurking inside a woman’s purse. Of course, not all women pack the same sundries, but I would imagine that there are many things found in your purse that are found in other (women’s) purses. There have been moments in history(my history) when a woman who I knew well, asked me to kindly retrieve something from her purse for her. I really wanted to avoid entering that private repository of personal female “stuff.” I reluctantly did so thinking how much this reminded me of some early sci-fi flick. “The Purse as Portal”- (to some unknown dimension.) With a fanciful imagination, it was not difficult to see my arm being grabbed and pulled by SOMETHING deep down in the dark recesses of the innocent-looking purse. Most men, I would guess, do not understand the necessity and importance of the contents of a woman’s purse and most men, at least those who do not joyfully use purses themselves, do not even know what is in one. Now we do. That was a very clever and original topic and I did enjoy it a lot.


  15. chelseaemilyjennakatrina permalink
    August 10, 2010 8:05 pm

    whatttts up homie ggggg?


  16. October 9, 2010 12:35 am

    Great post idea!

    You carry more stuff in your purse than I do. I carry bits of paper and receipts. I have a pen pouch to find my pens, batteries, and markers. Sometimes I have difficulty finding the pen pouch. When I have a tote, I carry lots more stuff and lean to one side. There’s no happy medium, except to carry on. 🙂


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