Practicing for Life…Math Sucks
So, in a way, yesterday was a big day for me. I took my first timed GRE practice test. I’m pretty confident that I rocked out on the Issue Task and Argument sections of the test — but in the practice formats there really isn’t a way to grade those. In fact, I felt like they were sort of easy looking back on it. I hope the practice test isn’t easier than the actual test will be. I mean, if it is what kind of practice would that be?
I actually got a nearly perfect score on the Verbal section. And I finished it in half the alloted time. Stellar verbal skills confirmed.
But the Quantitative section — otherwise known as math — handed me my butt. And I mean handed me both cheeks with both hands. Painful baby.
First of all, you aren’t allowed to use a calculator. Color me panicked.
Second, I ran out of time.
And finally, I got 15 questions wrong.
So that means I only got 13 right. I wonder how good my math score has to be to get into a creative writing program? I’m guessing better than that. (side note: LOGAN I REALLY DO NEED YOU! You aren’t allowed to leave town again until I have this test taken! Please? I’ll buy you lunch! Breakfast! Beer! Anything! I NEED YOU!)
After my mathematical defeat I topped off my day trying to schedule the test and the time I had picked out is no longer available. DAMN!
I finally stopped stalling me and now I feel like the Universe is stalling me. I just wish I knew why.
Maybe I’m not supposed to go to grad school next fall after all. I still haven’t picked even a short list of schools. My initial reaction to most of them is a lurch of my stomach. I looked at schools in Washington today and the programs require work in a language besides English. My German really isn’t that good. I’d rather not have to relearn that.
Oh, the nausea.
Other than that, the programs sounded good. But I think I really need the sunlight. I don’t know if I could live in Seattle — even just for 3 years. Oh…there goes my stomach again. I guess that one’s off the list. Oh, but that idea makes my stomach hurt too.
I think I’ve spent too many years ignoring my instincts. I don’t recognize them anymore!
I’ve started working on a new book in the meantime. It’s kind of a memoir. Or a collection of memoirs. It’s sad. Or, it’s about something sad. One of my friends at church asked me yesterday what was wrong and I think I’m just sad because of the topic. But it’s important. I have to do it. My instincts have made that one pretty clear.
So maybe that’s what I’m supposed to be working on instead of going to grad school next year. This book could easily take years. First things first though. I’m going to keep pushing and applying for grad school this fall (for next fall). I guess I’ll see what’s supposed to be when I get the responses from the schools.